You can't sweat out . . .

Larry Legend, Baby Shaq and MJ: youtube comes through

In The Sporting Life on February 20, 2009 at 8:04 am

Last night on youtube (it was a glamorous Thursday night) I decided to take a break from watching Charlie Bit My Finger, and instead pay homage to Basketball Jesus, Larry Bird.  After watching numerous videos showing the Hick from French Lick throwing passes through the legs of opposing defenders and swishing shots that other players would have no business taking, I delved further into classic NBA clips.

I dare you to find one thing wrong with his form

I dare you to find one thing wrong with his shooting form. Or his mustache.

The following is by no means a top five list of NBA youtube videos, but they are five NBA clips that I watched last night and I think you should check out:

5.  Vince Carter dunks on a 7’2” Frenchman

This is perhaps the most flat out athletic play you will ever see.  It reminds me of the time that I dunked on the 7′ Sean Corrigan.  Except that didn’t happen.  You’ll notice if you watch the rest of the videos below, Carter is the only one who appears to get angry after completing his dunk.  This is what the late 90’s and early 00’s brought unfortunately, when the only way to celebrate a fantastic play is to look pissed off.  Of course, I have never dunked on anyone, let alone jump over them.  Maybe it makes you mad.

4.  Shaquille O’Neal at LSU

This highlight reel from when Shaq was in college reminds me of a simpler time.  A time when TGIF was king.  I first laid eyes on Shaq in the 1989 NCAA tournament, and became completely enamored with him for the remainder of the tournament.  It even led me to eventually purchase an original Shaq Orlando Magic jersey, which I wore proudly until I realized that every other no talent ass clown in Maine also had it.

3. Top 10 Michael Jordan Dunks

There is not much that needs to be said about these dunks.  Jordan was just on a whole different level.  The way he jumps, makes contact with an opposing player, and then elevates even higher, is unfathomable.  #7 is perhaps the greatest open court play I have ever seen.  He just completely decimates the entire Heat defense before dunking on them.  #1 is mine, and everyone else’s, all time favorite Michael Jordan dunk, when he fakes John Starks out of his shorts and then hammers on the sweatiest man in the history of basketball, Patrick Ewing.

But the greatest dunk on this list?  It has to be #2.  Not only is it a fantastic dunk, it is also a ridiculous showcase of short shorts and spandex.  Kelly Tripucka gets absolutely worked over.  It is almost as embarrassing as his outfit.

2.  Larry Bird, #1 NCAA Shooter of All-Time

Sure, this isn’t one of the best Larry Bird videos out there, but the fact that it has commentary from the most entertaining announcer in the history of Western civilization, Bill Walton, along with music from Van Morrison, pushes this to near the top.  At the 1:00 mark, Walton makes the comment about Bird, “He couldn’t run at his peak faster than I could walk today.”  Never before has a tall white man with horrible knees made a reference to how he can walk faster than another tall white man can run.  This comment ranks up there with when I was watching a Spurs game a few years ago and heard Bill Walton call Robert Horry the “best inbounds passer in the history of basketball.”

Also, it must be commented on that the producers of this video chose to use Filter’s song “Hey Man, Nice Shot” in the background.  It’s always appropriate to include a song about suicide in a basketball video.

1. Larry Bird Montage

Not many words need to be written about 3:46 of Basketball Jesus highlights with a classic John Cougar Mellencamp song in the background.  But be sure to watch Larry Legend make a ridiculous left handed runner at at the 1:26 mark, if only to witness the fan wearing short white shorts and a tie dyed button down go nuts in the stands.

  1. Sean

    I did not watch any of those videos. And yet, I can tell you specifics about both the Jordan dunk on Tripucka and the Bird runner.

    The Jordan dunk: In Charlotte (probably 1989/90) he comes down the right side, does an inside-out/fake cross-over, gets to two feet on a hop-step and absolutely embarrasses the entire Tripucka family, past, present, and future. It’s nice to know that MJ wasn’t always the guy who had to post up and take fadeaways to get shots off.

    The Bird lefty-runner: Against the Pistons, Game 7 of the ’87 Eastern Conference Finals. He drives left and banks it in. Watching old footage of this shot inspired a young Tommy Nale to start using his left hand on shots in and around the paint. Skowhegan primary and middle school basketball would be forever scarred.

  2. while attending basketball camp as a child, our coaches and instructors said to watch larry bird’s form. study it. become it. live it.

    sadly, larry bird was retired at this time in my life. and of course i did not have a full stache nor did i have a vast collection of reel to reel films of basketball jesus playing. tear.

    but my how times have changed! since scoping out these videos, i’ve already made three wasterpaper basket jumpers in my cube today. anddd now my mustache is thick, sandy blonde and beautiful.
    man, i’m on fire! thanks basketball jesus!!!

  3. excellent choice of videos. I would like to add another for those who can’t get enough of watching Bird dominate. A great montage set to a fantastic 80s song, you just can’t lose and neither could Bird.

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