You can't sweat out . . .

BYU lineman celebrates win; can’t have sex with girlfriend

In The Sporting Life on September 27, 2011 at 5:40 pm

In a shocking turn of events, just before the NCAA tournament last year, Brandon Davies, a starter on the BYU hoops team, was suspended for violating the school’s honor code, which states that students are not allowed to take part in (even) consensual sex.

It seems that #91 here will have to satisfy all his carnal needs on a huge buffet at the Sizzler.


Just another outbreak of JSF, this time in Marquette MI

In Outbreaks on January 7, 2011 at 10:32 pm

Bud Sargent knows just what the fever is all about.  In fact, in an article he wrote last year in The Mining Journal (true story), he describes several females severely taken by the fever.

Two women – note I said women and not girls – were ahead of me in line there and I couldn’t help but overhear their conversation.

The one on the left said she had heard Stamos, who is, perhaps, best known for his portrayal of Uncle Jesse on the TV sitcom “Full House,” was seen just the night before in a local bar, actually drinking and chatting it up with the locals.

Her friend was barely able to contain herself and breathlessly nodded that she was in receipt of the same report. She suggested that they should ask him out for a drink if they got the chance when he exited the federal courthouse following that morning’s testimony.

That’s the fever right there, my friends.

In fact, the paper’s managing editor even gave the story the headline Stamos Fever’ grips city amid federal prosecution.

Pretty sure that managing editor owes me a reference in his next missive to the fine* people of Marquette, Michigan.  And who would that be?  Yup, you guessed it.  Bud Sargent.

* maybe they aren’t so fine, considering the reason Johnny Gorgeous was in town was to appear in court as the victim of an extortion attempt.  Check out the Mining Journal like whoa.


Vince Chase’s character is based on Uncle Jesse

In Jesse, the Rippers, and their contemporaries on August 6, 2010 at 10:45 pm

Don’t even think for a minute that I’ve missed that fact that our Golden Boy has joined the cast of Entourage, playing a hilarious sore loser/one time candidate to be Johnny Drama’s co-star.  Looking as young and Uncle Jesse-like as ever no less.  It’s great to see America’s Favorite Uncle (this title is not supported by any sort of nonsense scientific voting) back on the small screen doing what he does best: being cool.  Looking as spry as he did back when he was dropping beats faster than he was dropping panties with the Rippers, Stamos on the show is a hardcore ping pong enthusiast.  With some pretty damn good moves, no stunt double needed, thank you very much.  This all reminds me of the Full House episode that I saw last week when Uncle Jesse lifts Nicki and Alex up, one in each arm, while he was leg pressing two thousand pounds.  Literally.  Don’t worry, Aunt Becky was spotting him.